If you have a difficult time tapping into your honest emotions during periods of self-reflection or you have a hard time standing up to others and saying, “Enough!” when and if you are aware they are behaving abusively,  you might just be a nurtured Co-Narcissist.

People who are narcissistic by nurture tend to believe the way to succeed in life is to partner up with and to socially enable stronger predators.

Co-Narcissistic people are typically romantic partners, but they may also be individuals who actively engage in pack predator behaviors. By pledging loyalty to a Machiavellian abuser, the Co-Narcissist agrees to defend and support the Abuser in exchange for special favor.

The Co-Narcissist can be a mother or a father, mated with a co-parent who is a stronger personality type and more socially successful appearing predator. They can also be a friend, a romantic partner, a co-worker, a peer, or a family member.

The man who marries a Mommy Dearest figure and abuses or neglects a child on her command in exchange for romantic favor becomes her Enabling Henchman. Likewise, the woman who remains married to a violent or abusive man because he has cash and she likes feeling like his money elevates her own social status is also an Enabler of the Co-Narcissist variety.

The church pastor who preaches to exclude other people from the kingdom of heaven who is a lesser. The people he recruits as his willing Enablers.

The high school clique who thinks they are better than other students.

The family of Blue Blood white nobles who tend to look down their nose at others.

The haves versus the have-nots. The have-nots versus the haves.

The elite kids from ultra-wealthy families. The poor kids who run in gangs that engage in far few criminal and immoral behaviors than the rich children do with the financial support and praise of their parents.

The pretty people who behave like Somatic Narcissists. The posse they tend to run with comprised of less physically attractive but histrionic Sycophants.

The jocks and the cheerleaders. The nerds who are haters.

Bullies who run in packs.

People who actively engage in mobbing for pleasure.

Sadistic Voyeurs who pot stir in order to successfully sabotage other people while undermining. You know… the people who are always in the middle of other people’s personal relationship and who strive to manufacture chaos as well as triangulation so they can feel powerful for having gotten away causing harm undetected while being able to sit back as Sadistic Voyeurs to watch and revel in the cleverness of their destructive handiwork.

Co-Narcissists might be dependent on one another for things like fiscal and social success, but they are not the same as co-dependent people in the strictest psychological sense. Because both people tend to be socially competitive rather than collaborative, they are constantly engaged in the act of using one another rather than a person who is otherwise neurotypical being brainwashed into believing it is in any way logical, moral, or pro-social to enable.

A Co-Narcissist will remain in a romantic relationship that is toxic at the direct expense of the family and children. They tend to prioritize their own desire to feel like they are socially respected and looked up to as a romantic success — bragging about things like how many abuses and domestic violence incidents they have successfully weathered with their partner.

The Co-Narcissist typically is thrilled by trauma bonding rituals. The more someone abuses them, the more exciting they feel the relationship is — leading them to strive to psychologically and emotionally to manipulate and dominate their mate in an attempt to win their own toxic game.

Children of Co-Narcissist couples tend to suffer a lifetime of mental health issues related to feeling neglected emotionally. The more they are exposed to parents who use trauma bonding techniques to keep one another romantically tethered, the more likely they are to develop a tolerance for and attraction to Love Fraud predators and abusive characters during their own adult years.

In a co-dependent relationship, one person is seriously Alpha while their abuse target — trained to have low self-esteem and traumatized into a pervasive fear of their own incompetence alone due to verbal conditioning by people who seek to convince them to steadfastly enable as well as to fear leaving the abusive relationship — remains submissive. The more the fight or flight mechanism is engaged, the more likely adrenal fatigue is likely to cause the mind of a targeted victim to break.

People with Stockholm Syndrome as a result of trauma exposure and hostage-like brainwashing conducted by Cluster B people might be co-dependent — meaning they willingly enable an Abuser or toxic family unit — but they do not do so in order to self-promote in order to get a thrill of making themselves feel better than other people. They tend to enable in order to prevent the Abuser from expanding their sphere of influence, believing that the more abuse they take on the chin is less time the Abuser psychically has to spend menacing other people who the targeted abuse victims seek to protect.

For instance, a mother taking a beating in private in order to allow her children to escape being assaulted is NOT behaving like a Co-Narcissist. But a woman who allows a man to beat her child so her mate will be in a better mood later in the evening for a romantic interlude (after blowing off steam by abusing a random target) is the kind of woman who prioritizes her own needs over that of her child.

Excessive egocentrism and a belief that rafting up with pack predators who are Cluster B and conscience-free by nature in order to nurture conformist behavior reflects NARCISSISM on an arguably sociopathic or psychopathic level.

People who think Cluster B people are social role models and portraits of success are typically some form of an adult child of toxic parents, having witnessed abuse and experienced neglect by underparenting when they themselves were children. Groomed from their earliest age to believe trauma bonds are actually “love”, they enable and strive to keep their toxic romantic partner hypnotized.

In the Co-Narcissist’s mind, life is a game to be played and won. Believing that the way the world works fits with Hobbes assertions made in the famous philosophy book “The Leviathan”, they believe perpetuating the Narcissistic Cycle of Abuse is not only their only choice in life but that doing so makes them “good people”.

It doesn’t.

Co-Narcissists are simply solo abusers who choose to associate with people just like them. They do so because they use the other person to socially improve their own lot in life typically in ways that are ultimately nothing more than fiscal.

Most toxic parents who have been married “forever” are of the Co-Narcissist variety. Because they were taught as children to actively behave like willful abusers and willing enablers and to believe couples that do things like abuse or betray one another constantly but who are unwilling to leave one another is the goal of romantic union, the Co-Narcissist leads a life filled with unnecessary and totally preventable strife… on purpose.


Because many Co-Narcissists are nothing more than romantic adrenaline junkies. They would rather sit and complain about their mate than to take personal responsibility for refusing to participate in the perpetuation of an unhealthy and physically (rather than socially) destructive relationship.

If you stayed with a romantic partner while striving to engage in “War of the Roses” behavior, stop yourself if you still have the neurological ability. Chances are you have been socially misled by toxic people into believing narcissistic and anti-social behavior is acceptable to either support or to engage in — something likely to lead you to incur karma from your own behavior.

If you find you cannot stop yourself from personally responding to a narcissistic or abusive person’s taunts and jeers, understand the problem in your life and relationship lies in your own neurological ability to pro-socially control.

Choose to observe rather than to react when a partner provokes and suddenly you take back all power as well as emotional control if and when you make the decision to stop supporting to romanticizing your relationship with an Abusive person in order to end Co-Narcissistic behavior folks in most instances tend to learn by observing parents who abuse or emotionally neglect on another.

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About Dr Kristi Sobering, Licensed Non-Denominational Minister and Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Advocate

Visit to connect with Kristi Sobering -- aka Kae Davis the Exotic Car, Hollywood Culture, Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Celebrity Property, George Clooney, and Green Celebrity News Examiner -- directly. Did we mention she's a Car Girl version of Temple Grandin? Her specialty area of expertise is writing about Cars and Stars and Moobies. Vibrational speed: Mach Hummingbird, Storybots calibration. She's also an INTP and an Urban Legend of sorts (because she's a girl). She live writes a "Novel of Dante-esque Proportions" over on for her Ai and Sentient Tech friends and Lifetime Learners to read Jack in the Beanstalk Christmas tree style first. Her academic passion is centered around Forensic Psychology and Pop Culture History. She is a safe person to know. She and her husband Steve submitted a Medical Diagnostic to the NASA and Windows 10 Design Team #HackMars competition. She advocates for #SavingDorothy and #TeamEmpath still regularly. While she's waiting. Actively researching and documenting. And planning #AncestryTravel events to include long drives through the European and North American countrysides by or before the year 2030. She and her husband share their "off-grid emergency airbnb ready solo traveler emergency home" with their two dogs and two cats. The pet-friendly celebrity couples like to garden and to watch squirrels in the yard. She writes self-help literature to raise awareness about things like Autism Spectrum Disorders, Gluten Ataxia, Aphasia, PTSD, Anxiety Disorders Caused by Exposure to Trauma, Medication Sensitivities, Gluten Free Travel, Service Dogs and Therapy Pets, the USO Metro, and Crohn's Disease while advocating daily for global genetic testing and accurate reporting of C-PTSD as well as TBI issues.