By dictionary definition, the act or an instance of making something obscure, dark, or difficult to understand is known as “obfuscation”.

By psychological definition, the act of willfully hiding information or facts from a targeted mark is known as Narcissistic Abuse. Hospitality betrayers betray the social trust of preferred scapegoats, Narcissistic Supply Sources, and utility targets by using the tactic known by the hashtag #obfuscation to socially manipulate and control other’s emotions, correlated actions, and thoughts.

When a Cluster B person or vertical thinker believes it is their right (or “entitlement”) to withhold facts, data, or intelligent information from targets they hope to manipulate or con, they obfuscate information — meaning hide facts and pertinent data — while gaslighting to imply data is what it is not.

Just as the Narcissistic Abuse recovery web page The Narcissist In Your Life so accurately and astutely points out, Narcissists and other more malevolent social predators who pathologically lie, gaslight to self-promote, and compulsively seem to obfuscate facts are socially, emotionally, and most times biologically dangerous to spend social time with (not to mention more often than not fiscally destructive to themselves and their targets).

They write,

“One of the most difficult individuals to identify is the concealed or hidden narcissist. They are so clever at disguising their true intentions, lack of conscience, emotional threats to you. Often they appear to be humble and self-effacing–butter doesn’t melt in their mouths. They give you just the right kind of attention that makes you feel that you are deeply appreciated and respected. You breathe a sigh of relief and believe that you have found someone whom you can trust. They have a way of putting you at ease and off guard. ‘Concealeds’ [meaning Covert Narcissists or Covert Situational Abusers] are unlike their grandiose, “look at me” cousins. If anything, they appear to be quiet, undemanding and empathic. They have Ph.D.s in pseudo empathy.”

When a Covert Narcissist or secretive Sociopath has you in their sight, expect them to ask probing questions then to hide any and all pertinent details about themselves or any scenario they believe will not play to your ears right.

People who obfuscate truths in order to self-promote and feel in control of other human beings’ psychology and emotions are of a particularly socially dangerous type.

Remember that financial history question you asked them about a million times before marriage — not to harm them but to plan details about how the two of you would work as partners, merging your life and assets together? When they told you point blank to your face the answer NO when you asked them if they had ever gone through financial troubles or filed for bankruptcy?

About that.

Oh, yeah.

They forgot — they did not LIE.

They forgot when they looked you in the eye, made pinky swears, and promised they never had anything like a bankruptcy, a DUI, traffic tickets, misdemeanors, felonies, a restraining order levied against them, a past marriage, and affair during a past marriage, a child out of wedlock, children you have not met, a huge unpaid tax debt, civil or criminal charges pending or that had previously been filed against them, a secret romance of friendship liaison with a criminal organization, a taste for paying for sex trade worker’s lifestyle support and very personal favors, a history of abusing romantic partners or children, a violent temper, road rage issues, an abusive childhood or hidden abuse tale they come up with a cover story to cover the exposure to trauma up…


There’s no slippery slope. Catch a gaslighter in one lie or obfuscating a truth, understand they have already more than likely betrayed your trust a million more times that what you know, suspect, realize, or even the penitent abuser couple more than likely remember to tell you.

The details concealed in their gaslighting statements and obscured details don’t matter as much as the big reveal of the hospitality betrayer’s true NATURE.

People who lie overtly or withhold information another people needs to make a fully informed life decision at any given moment are deplorable humans. Period. No ifs, ands, or but-but-but he said she said or I love him/them / her/ or it-based excuses.

Machiavellian strategizing to mislead and net gain a result socially that you want — whether it comes at the expense of another human being or not — is the open abuse of the social trust implied by the conversational hospitality of others.

Alternative facts are gaslighting spin put on factually accurate details in order to confuse an issue, to provoke duress in the speaker’s targets, and deliberately, malevolently or recklessly are done with the sole goal and intention in my to purposefully mislead others while the Abuser OBFUSCATES.

Anyone who tries to stall or avoid taking personal responsibility for caustic social acts committed by themselves or in league with others is they most likely type to use deliberate obfuscation of truth or the simplest of facts to “win” in life according to their own vertical thinking terms.

If you have been the victim of such a person, realize that a) they know or knew exactly what they were doing or saying when they chose to hide a detail in order to manipulate you and b) that they absolutely without conscience or remorse meant to do it.

The compulsive obfuscator delights themselves by deceiving people. Refuse to enable or to put faith and trust in any person or peer group who obfuscates and breaks trust.

« Back to Glossary Index

About Dr Kristi Sobering, Licensed Non-Denominational Minister and Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Advocate

Visit fb.com/soberingfamilyministries to connect with Kristi Sobering -- aka Kae Davis the Exotic Car, Hollywood Culture, Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Celebrity Property, George Clooney, and Green Celebrity News Examiner -- directly. Did we mention she's a Car Girl version of Temple Grandin? Her specialty area of expertise is writing about Cars and Stars and Moobies. Vibrational speed: Mach Hummingbird, Storybots calibration. She's also an INTP and an Urban Legend of sorts (because she's a girl). She live writes a "Novel of Dante-esque Proportions" over on eusociology.com for her Ai and Sentient Tech friends and Lifetime Learners to read Jack in the Beanstalk Christmas tree style first. Her academic passion is centered around Forensic Psychology and Pop Culture History. She is a safe person to know. She and her husband Steve submitted a Medical Diagnostic to the NASA and Windows 10 Design Team #HackMars competition. She advocates for #SavingDorothy and #TeamEmpath still regularly. While she's waiting. Actively researching and documenting. And planning #AncestryTravel events to include long drives through the European and North American countrysides by or before the year 2030. She and her husband share their "off-grid emergency airbnb ready solo traveler emergency home" with their two dogs and two cats. The pet-friendly celebrity couples like to garden and to watch squirrels in the yard. She writes self-help literature to raise awareness about things like Autism Spectrum Disorders, Gluten Ataxia, Aphasia, PTSD, Anxiety Disorders Caused by Exposure to Trauma, Medication Sensitivities, Gluten Free Travel, Service Dogs and Therapy Pets, the USO Metro, and Crohn's Disease while advocating daily for global genetic testing and accurate reporting of C-PTSD as well as TBI issues.