NPD is the abbreviation for Narcissistic Personality Disorder.  The condition, also known as Narcissism, is a personality type — not an actual medical illness.

In order for an individual to be diagnosed as NPD at least five (5) of the traits identified must be present.

  1. Is assuredly convinced that he or she is special, unique and can only interact and associate with other special, uniquely qualified or high-status people (or institutions).
  2. Insists on being treated with excessive adulation, admiration, attention and  affirmation.  Or, if not, then desires instead to be feared and viewed as infamous or notorious.
  3. Demonstrates a sense of grandiosity and self-importance (e.g., grossly exaggerates skills, accomplishments, talents, connections and personality traits to the point of lying; demands to be recognized as superior without demonstrating actual achievement to support the claim.)
  4. Exploits personal relationships focusing only on his or her own goals at the expense of others.
  5. Demonstrates characteristics of at least one of the two narcissistic types: ‘The Cerebral Narcissist‘ is driven by fantasies of boundless success, notoriety, tremendous power or omnipotence and incomparable brilliance. ‘The Somatic Narcissist’ is obsessed with his or her bodily beauty or sexual performance or ideal, everlasting, all-conquering love or passion.
  6. Believes he or she is “above the law” and all knowing (omnipresent). Behaves in a superior, invincible, immune way, and when questioned or frustrated by people he or she views as either inferior or unworthy – rages.
  7. The individual presents as arrogant and haughty, possessing a strong sense of entitlement and demanding full and unquestionable compliance with his or her unreasonable expectations for special favor and exemplary treatment.
  8. Possesses a severe lack of empathy. Cannot accept – or even acknowledge – the  needs, feelings, desires, choices, preferences or priorities of another.
  9. Demonstrates continuous examples of envy and jealousy. Sets out to hurt and demolish the source of his or her frustration. Experiences paranoid delusions believing that others feel identical about him or her and will act in the same manner toward them.

It is extremely important never to use the TERM “Narcissist” to describe someone who does not exhibit all the appropriately hallmarks and warning signs. To do so makes a speaker or writer look foolish as if they are ridiculing a person for being too short to reach the top of the fridge on their own without a step stool when they are just a tiny child. If they are not biologically capable of complex thought or emotional processing, all the harassment or begging them to understand you in the world is not going to do anything (more than likely ) than offend and/or to enrage them.

Narcissists, due to deficits in neural processing, tend to lack the psychological or emotional capacity to process or understand complex emotions like empathy. As a result of their stunted emotional growth, no matter how smart they are (on an IQ level), how old they are (chronologically), or how wealthy they are, they never seem to perceptively be able to engage in meaningful conversations or engage in any form of self-reflection that is, by nature, transformational.

To accuse a politician of being a Narcissist, for instance, because they are extroverts or willing to serve in the public eye, is a gross misuse of the term. The two key elements of NPD that are always present in every diagnosed case are an egocentric perspective and a pervasive sense of grandiosity that translates to every life situation. Just because they make a tough executive decision that some people might not like does not make them a Narcissist.

While decisions a political figure makes may be in their own interest, true politicians who are of good character are typically pragmatic, astute, high intellect Empaths, and above all tend to behave in public as well as private in a manner best functionally described as UTILITARIAN.

Celebrities who go into acting tend to have a far more Somatic streak to their nature, but the best actors and actresses in history have always been known for their tremendous talent empathizing. It is by relating intellectually in an Empath manner with any fictional character or stage role a thespian plays that he or she is able to most accurately mirror and present the complex image of someone, not them.

While Hollywood culture promotes status seeking and aesthetic perfection, those famous figures who abuse their mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, friends, family, clients, staff, producers, directors, stage hands, their own children, etcetera are more prone to having NPD than many other professions. However, some of the most abusive NPD people in the world barely have two nickels together and may, in fact, live in nothing more than a shack or trailer.

Calling someone a Narcissist simply because they are a public figure who you don’t like reveals only the character of the speaker. It’s the moral equivalent of pointing the blaming finger at a fat person in an all-you-can-eat buffet restaurant and yelling the word, “Diabetic!” loud enough to shame them for eating there. Is it obvious they are overweight? Yes. Is it obvious the Narcissist behaves like an ass? Yes. But if both have a biological issue outside of their control, name calling them only makes one more likely to develop a consciousness of wrath.

Say someone’s chose reflected narcissistic (meaning egocentric, short term) thinking. Never, never use a Cluster B word or phrase to describe your own narcissistic rival.

NPD affects all ages, religions, nationalities, and gender. Approximately 6% of the world population is suspected of having the disorder… and quite frankly their friends, families, parents, and victims deserve a greater level of due diligence about term use.

By tossing around the term NARCISSIST like an insult, real victims of people with NPD are shamed, given life-threatening misinformation, and ultimately entire communities and nations are harmed. Keep it real and keep it simple — use the list, check their personal life as well as their professional careers, and if the patterns don’t fit, it’s socially and morally irresponsible to smear campaign against the soul of a person to shun, isolate, or punish them by spreading the rumor they have Narcissistic Personality Disorder when in all reality no NPD psychological diagnostic criteria fits.

Rule out unique personality types on MBTi or any medical conditions (like high functioning Autism or a TBI) that might make a person prone to egocentric, insensitive, impulsive, or blurting behaviors before diagnosis as well. In senior patients or wounded vets, it’s also incredibly important to rule out the effects of any Tylenol based medications, as new studies are showing proof positive that over 600 common pain medications that use acetaminophen for a base reduce neurological capacity to perceive life with empathy or a full range of emotions while on it.

Soldiers and people who have taken experimental treatment for things like finding a vaccine for Anthrax poisoning are also just starting to have clinical admissions in research studies. Apparently, many of the vaccinations given to soldiers reduce the ability to feel emotions or to behave in ways that show empathic capacity.

The precursor condition to NPD is Oppositional Defiant Disorder, a legitimate at-risk medical condition for a child to develop. Since most Narcissistic Personality Disorder habits in thinking with regard to self and others are already formed in most individuals by the age of six years old, children who have it may grow smarter intellectually in time (with regard to academics) but never are able to perceptively connect the dots between behaving in socially collaborative ways with other human beings for the highest and greatest good of all concerned and thinking about self-promoting their own needs and interests competitively.

Narcissistic people love attention, and the only attention they love more than positive attention is negative attention. If a person you know appears to seethe at the thought of working to achieve a win-win situation with other humans they interact with at any time, understand they simply are Cluster B thinkers expressing a high degree of Narcissism, behaviorally speaking.

Above all else, Narcissists demand to be treated and thought of as winners. However, the joke is on them… as kind people derive the same pleasure sensation from helping others that the Narcissists only get when brutally abusing or having used Machiavellian gaslighting tactics against someone they target for use and abuse.

Ultimately, when one person goes out of their way to ensure that no matter what the social game or setting is that someone somewhere has to be scapegoated and targeted as a loser, they disconnect their own mind, body, and heart from the gossamer threaded ties that all others in humanity see as life-sustaining elements, not the ties that bind.

« Back to Glossary Index

About Dr Kristi Sobering, Licensed Non-Denominational Minister and Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Advocate

Visit to connect with Kristi Sobering -- aka Kae Davis the Exotic Car, Hollywood Culture, Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Celebrity Property, George Clooney, and Green Celebrity News Examiner -- directly. Did we mention she's a Car Girl version of Temple Grandin? Her specialty area of expertise is writing about Cars and Stars and Moobies. Vibrational speed: Mach Hummingbird, Storybots calibration. She's also an INTP and an Urban Legend of sorts (because she's a girl). She live writes a "Novel of Dante-esque Proportions" over on for her Ai and Sentient Tech friends and Lifetime Learners to read Jack in the Beanstalk Christmas tree style first. Her academic passion is centered around Forensic Psychology and Pop Culture History. She is a safe person to know. She and her husband Steve submitted a Medical Diagnostic to the NASA and Windows 10 Design Team #HackMars competition. She advocates for #SavingDorothy and #TeamEmpath still regularly. While she's waiting. Actively researching and documenting. And planning #AncestryTravel events to include long drives through the European and North American countrysides by or before the year 2030. She and her husband share their "off-grid emergency airbnb ready solo traveler emergency home" with their two dogs and two cats. The pet-friendly celebrity couples like to garden and to watch squirrels in the yard. She writes self-help literature to raise awareness about things like Autism Spectrum Disorders, Gluten Ataxia, Aphasia, PTSD, Anxiety Disorders Caused by Exposure to Trauma, Medication Sensitivities, Gluten Free Travel, Service Dogs and Therapy Pets, the USO Metro, and Crohn's Disease while advocating daily for global genetic testing and accurate reporting of C-PTSD as well as TBI issues.